I researched your entire family tree and it seems you were the sap.
Yo momma's so dumb she sent me a fax with a stamp on it
When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price?
Yo momma's so dumb it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes
Some people are has-beens. You are a never-was.
You are so dumb, you play solitaire...for cash.
You're as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.
If I ever need a brain transplant, I'd choose yours because I'd want a brain that had never been used.
One more wrinkle and you'd pass for a prune.
Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you be yourself.
Your family wasn't dysfunctional until you arrived.
Yo momma's car's so ugly someone broke in just to steal The CLUB
Yo momma's so poor each night she goes to KFC to lick other folks fingers
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on earth.
Yo momma's so dumb she told me to meet her at the corner of Walk and don't Walk
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
Yo momma's so ugly I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a job application
People clap when they see you -- their hands over their eyes or ears.
Yo momma's so dumb she went to Gap to fix her teeth
Yo momma's so old I looked in her year book and saw jesus
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
Yo momma's so ugly when she was born the doctor smacked the wrong end
Yo momma's so dumb if brains were dynamite she wouldnt have enough to blow her nose
Yo momma's so dirty they filmed Gorillas in the mist in her shower
Yo momma's so poor each night she goes to KFC to lick other folks fingers
Yo momma's so old that when she was in school there was no history class
Yo momma's so dumb I saw her walking down the street yelling into an envelope asked what she was doing and she said sending a voice mail.
For those who never forget a face, you are an exception.
You have signs on both ears saying "Space for Rent".
Yo momma's so ugly that she went to an ugly contest and they said sorry no professionals
Yo momma's so dumb she put on her glasses to watch 20/20
Pay no heed to it. Go right on in.
The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.
Yo momma's so dumb she reckoned a Quarterback was a refund
Ever since I saw you in your family tree, I've wanted to cut it down.
Yo momma's so dumb she tried to steal a free sample
Yo momma's so dumb she took you to the drive-in movie theater to see Closed for the season
Yo momma's so dumb her breasts are square cuz she forgot to take the Kleenex out of the box
I heard you went to a freak show and got in FREE!
I used to think that you were a big pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.
Yo momma's so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies
Yo momma's so dumb she was looking at a paper and I asked her what you doing? and she said watching paper view
Yo momma's so wrinkled she has to screw her hat on
You are so old, the candles on your birthday cake raised earth's temperature by 3 degrees.
If you spoke your mind, you'd be speechless.
I guess you prove that even god makes mistakes sometimes.
If my dog had your face, I would shave his ass and make him walk backwards.
Yo momma's so dumb she thought the Board of Education was a piece of wood
Yo momma's so dumb she asked me whats that letter after X and I said Y she said Cause I want to know
I've had many cases of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you.
Yo momma's so dumb when the computer said Press any key to continue she couldn't find the Any key
When they made you, they broke the mold---and beat the mold maker.
I look into your eyes and get the feeling someone else is driving.
If stupidity hurt, you'd go through life on a morphine drip.
The last time I saw a face like yours I threw it a fish!
Yo momma's so ugly I took her to the zoo and the guy at the door said Thanks for bringing her back
You have a Teflon brain - nothing sticks.
Yo momma's so ugly people hang her picture in their cars so their radios don't get stolen
You are so old, you sat next to Jesus in school.
Yo momma's so dumb she asked for help to use Hamburger Helper
All day I thought of you...I was at the zoo.
Yo momma's so poor she waves an ice cube around and calls it Air conditioning
Yo momma's so old she was a waitress at the last supper
Yo momma's so poor when I rang the doorbell she leaned out the window and said DING DONG
Yo momma's so poor she bounces food stamps
Why don't you slip into something more comfortable...like a coma.
Yo momma's so ugly kids dress up as her for Halloween
Yo momma's so cheap she washes paper plates
to work that day. I believe in business before pleasure.
Yo momma's so poor her front and back doors are on the same hinge
Yo momma's so lazy she thinks a two income family is where yo daddy has two jobs
To make you laugh on Saturday, I need to you joke on Wednesday.
I guess you prove that even god makes mistakes sometimes.
Brains aren't everything. In fact in your case they're nothing.
Yo momma's so old the candles cost more than the birthday cake
Your family tree is nothing but a rest stop for dogs.
Yo momma's so old one of her pets was on on Noahs Ark
You weren't fully debugged before being released.
They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking,
Yo momma's so dumb she went to Walgreens to see if the walls were really green
Yo momma's so poor people rob her house for practice
You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.
You're at least one Brady short of a Bunch.
Yo momma's so dumb her shoes say TGIF - toes go in front
You're a few fries short of a Happy Meal.
Yo momma's so dumb that when she surfed the internet she put a wetsuit on
If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport
I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won.
You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Yo momma's so dumb she went to Disney World and saw a sign that said Disney World Left so she went home
You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you.
Some people have called you a wit... They're half right !
Yo momma's so dirty her Sure deodorant is now Confused
Yo momma's so dumb she got on an elevator and thought it was a mobile home
You fear success, but really have nothing to worry about.
Yo momma's so dumb she spent 30 minutes lookin at an orange juice box because it said concentrate
I fart to make you smell better.
Yo momma's so dumb she went to the store to buy a color TV and asked what colors they had
Yo momma's so dumb she leaves tell tales signs she's been using my computer: white out is on the screen
You are the reason God created the middle finger.
You are so old, even your memory is in black and white.
I'll hit you so hard your kids will be born dizzy!
I hear the only place You are ever invited is outside.
I'll hit you so hard you'll have to unzip your pants to say hi!
Yo momma's so ugly the psychiatrist makes her lie face down
Yo momma's so dumb I told her drinks were on the house so she went and got a ladder
Yo momma's so dirty she slowed down Speed Stick
I would ask you how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.
Yo momma's so dumb I said lets go to the superbowl and she ran and got a spoon
Yo momma's so dumb she thinks Christmas Wrap is Snoop Dogg's holiday album
Is your name Maple Syrup? It should be, you sap.
You prefer three left turns to one right turn.
Sure, I've seen people like you before - but I had to pay an admission.
Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?
Yo momma's so dumb she passed by YMCA and said hey look they spelled MACYs wrong
Yo momma's so dumb she uses Old Spice for cooking
The twinkle in your eyes is actually the sun shining between your ears.
Yo momma's so poor she married young just to get the rice
Yo momma's so ugly she gave Freddy Kruger nightmares
You're a dim bulb in the marquee of life.
Yo momma's so dumb when she pulls up to a flashing red light it sounds like Vroom Screech Vroom Screech
You are living proof that God has a sense of humor.
When you get to the men`s room, you will see a sign that says, "Gentlemen."
You're as useless as a screen door on a submarine.
Yo momma's so dumb she thought brownie points were coupons for a bake sale
You think Cheerios are doughnut seeds.
Yo momma's so dumb she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for a gumball to come out
You are so ugly she could scare the moss off a rock!
Yo momma's so dumb she thinks socialism means partying
Yo momma's so dumb she has to use her fingers for 1 + 1
Yo momma's so poor people rob her house for practice
Yo momma's breath stinks so bad that people look forward to her farts
People can't say that you have absolutely nothing! After all, you have inferiority!
Yo momma's so cheap instead of buying a fire alarm she hangs Jiffy Pop from the ceiling
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
Yo momma's so dumb she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go
I wish your charm could be bottled--then a cork could be put in it.
Yo momma's so dumb she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican Phone Company
other people because they have to look at you.
Your house is so dirty you have to wipe your feet before you go outside.
We all spring from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.
We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.
Yo momma's so old she's mentioned in the shout out at the end of the bible
You are so old, your birth-certificate expired.
You are so old, you fart dust.
Yo momma's so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone
Your family tree is a tumbleweed.
Yo momma's so poor I walked into her house and stepped on a cigarette butt and she said Hey who turned off the heater?
Yo momma's so ugly her Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye
Yo momma's so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone
Yo momma's so dumb I put a ScratchNSniff sticker on the bottom of the pool and she drowned
You're so dumb, blondes tell jokes about you.
You are so dumb, you planted a dogwood tree and expected a litter of puppies.
Yo momma's so dumb she thought Boyz2Men was a daycare center
I feel sorry for you because you are so homely, but I feel even sorrier for
Save your breath...You'll need it to blow up your date.
Yo momma's so dumb she ran outside with a purse because she heard there was change in the weather
You tell people you live just up the street from the corner of Walk and Don't Walk.
Yo momma's so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote
Yo momma's so dumb she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court
Yo momma's so poor I went through her front door and ended up in the back yard
Yo momma's so dumb when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put OK
Yo momma's so dumb she sold her Car for gas money
You're a few planets short of a Federation
Yo momma's so dumb when she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home she moved
Yo momma's so poor I walked into her house and swatted a firefly and said Who turned off the lights?
You are so stupid, you'd trip over a cordless phone.
You call people to ask them for their phone number.
Your head whistles in a cross wind.
You must be the arithmetic man -- you add trouble, subtract pleasure, divide
You are so was so ugly they used to push your face into dough to make gorilla cookies
All day I thought of you...I was at the zoo.
They say Will Rogers never met a man he didn't like, obviously he never met you.
Are your parents siblings?
Don't go to a mind reader; go to a palm reader; I know you've got a palm.
You're so dense, light bends around you.
You are so ugly she could scare the chrome off a bumper!
No, a polygon is not a dead parrot.
Yo momma's smells so bad she went to Taco Bell and everyone ran for the border
Yo momma's so dumb she snuck on the bus and paid to get off
Yo momma's so dumb she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said Guess so she said Levis
What are you going to do for a face when the babboon wants his ass back?
Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
Yo momma's breath so bad she has to take prescription Tic Tac
You look like you just escaped from planet of the apes.
There's two things I really hate about you: your face!
Yo momma's so poor she does drive by shootings on the bus
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
You stare at frozen juice cans because they say, "concentrate".
I heard that you went to the haunted house and they offered you a job.
You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.
You must be from the shallow end of the gene pool.
You are so old, even your memory is in black and white.
Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.
You inspired the slogan, "A mind is a terrible thing to waste."
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
Are you always an idiot, or just when I'm around?
I'll hit you so hard you'll have to unzip your pants to say hi!
Is your name Dan Druff? You get into people's hair.
Moonlight becomes you -- total darkness even more.
Yo momma's so poor she can't afford to pay attention
I hear you are being accepted into an exclusive club because they need someone to snub.
Yo momma's so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save milk
Yo momma's so dumb I told her Christmas was just around the corner and she went looking for it
If brains were dynamite, you would not have enough to blow your nose.
Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
I'd like to break the monotony; where's your weakest point?
You are so stupid, when you heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, you went out.
Yo momma's so dumb she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet
Yo momma's so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals
Yo momma's so poor burglars break in and leave money
Yo momma's so dumb she sold the house to pay the mortgage
You remind me of the ocean -- you make me sick.
If I told you that I have a piece of dirt in my eye, would you move?
Is your name Laryngitis? You're a pain in the neck.
Yo momma's so dumb on her job application where it says emergency contact she put 911
The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.
Yo momma's so old her memory is in black and white
Yo momma's so po she can't even afford the last two letters
Yo momma's so dumb I saw her in the frozen food section with a fishing rod
I refuse to engage in a battle of wits, as I will not take advantage of the handicapped.
The mind reader had a very busy day today reading minds. You were a vacation for him.
Yo momma's so dumb she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W&Ws
I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
You're so boring, your dreams have Muzak.
So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
I'm looking forward to the pleasure of your company since I haven't had it yet.
I hear the only place You are ever invited is outside.
Yo momma's so dumb she failed a survey
Yo momma's so old she walked into an antique store and they kept her
Yo momma's so dumb I told her I was reading a book by Homer and she asked if I had anything written by Bart
Yo momma's so dumb she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to makeup her mind
Someone said that you are not fit to sleep with pigs. I stuck up for the pigs.
I heard that you were a Ladykiller. They take one look at you and die of shock.
Believe me, I don't want to make a monkey out of you. Why should I take all the credit?
Yo momma's so dumb and poor that when I came over for dinner she read me recipes
Our friendship is like that of a dog to a fire hydrant.
If ugly were a crime, you'd get a life sentence.
intelligent, and cultured.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, you just gargled.
Yo momma's so dumb I saw her jumping up and down asked what she was doing and she said she drank a bottle of medicine and forgot to shake it.
I would love to beat you up, but I have a problem with cruelty to dumb animals.
Yo momma's so ugly her dentist treats her by mail order
Yo momma's so old one of her pets was on on Noahs Ark
In the battle of wits, you fight unarmed.
You're ski lift doesn't go to the top of the hill.
Your house is so nasty, I tripped over a rat, and a cockroach stole my wallet.
Yo momma's so ugly they put her face on a milk carton and it spoiled
Yo momma's so ugly hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats
Yo momma's so dumb she sold her camera to buy film
I love what you've done with your hair. How did you get it to come out of one nostril like that?
You conserve toilet paper by using both sides.
attention, and multiply ignorance.
When you haul ass, she has to make two trips.
You're so dumb, your dog teaches you tricks.
You may be a beauiful person on the inside, too bad you were born on the outside!
Yo momma's so dumb she thought meow mix was music for cats
Yo momma's so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police that she got mugged
Sit down and give your mind a rest.
Yo momma's so old she got hieroglyphics on her Driver license
Yo momma's so poor when yo family watches TV they go to Sears
Yo momma's so old she has an autographed bible
Yo momma's so dumb when I said we were playing craps she went and got toilet paper
You're a legend in your own mind.
People say that you are the perfect idiot. I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing alright.
You thinks Taco Bell is where you pay for your phone calls to Mexico.
I don't mind that you are talking so long as you don't mind that I'm not listening.
Yo momma's so dumb she saw a billboard that said Dodge Trucks and she started ducking through traffic
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
Yo momma's so dumb she noticed a sign reading Wet Floor so she just did
Your mind is on vacation but your mouth is working overtime.
Yo momma's so old she drove a chariot to high school
You're as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.
You are so old, when you were a kid rainbows were black and white.
Yo momma's so old when she ran the 100 meter dash they timed her with a sundial
They say that two heads are better than one. In your case, one would have been better than none.
Yo momma's so ugly even the Elephant Man makes jokes about her
Yo momma's so dumb she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds
You're at least one Brady short of a Bunch.
Yo momma's so dumb she asked me Whats the number for 911?
You have Diarrhea of the mouth; constipation of the ideas.
Yo momma's so dirty she made Right Guard turn left
You have the face of a saint. Saint Bernard, that is.



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